In my other post, I outlined some of the great life lessons I learned (or tried to learn) in 2009.

This note is about some of the lighter things that I learned from my 2009 experience:

1. When Bob Proctor tells you that you are wrong about something, he’s not going to change his mind. Face it, you’re wrong. It’s his house, he decides when he is right and you are wrong.
2. If you spend the whole winter away from Canada, the border police won’t believe that you’re only bringing $20 worth of goods back with you… and they’ll tear your entire car apart to prove themselves wrong.
3. When you tell people that you are in a reality show, they give you special treatment nearly anywhere you go. (Even if that reality show is your own YouTube channel)
4. Seat warmers are nice in -30 weather.  Someone should invent speaker warmers for -30 weather, though… I might still have all 12 speakers in my Bose 12 speaker system if they did.
5. Scottsdale Arizona has a much nicer winter than Winnipeg Manitoba, but black leather interior isn’t so smart for Arizona summers.
6. When someone with 0 friends requests you on Facebook and you are suspicious, you are usually right.
7. If you decide to crash a body-painting convention, make sure you shave your chest.
8. If you post pictures of yourself driving your shiny yellow car all over the USA, your Canadian insurance company is not likely to cover accidents.
9. $1200 is an expensive way to replace 1 tire on your car when you let someone else drive it over a big rock.
10. When a drunk friend posts a mean message on your Facebook wall and then later apologizes with a private message, 3500 facebook friends don’t see the apology.
11. Decreases in your net worth due to mathematical errors are easier to handle than ones due to stupid decisions.
12. Learning to play love songs on guitar is probably more satisfying when the person you’re singing them for actually shows up.
13. Despite having a major crush on Kelly Clarkson for the last several years, I don’t regret not going on a date with her when I had the chance. (Yeah, she might not feel the same way, but that’s okay…)

Overall, 2009 was a great, funny, exciting, adventurous and satisfying year. I’m hoping to learn different lessons in 2010, though.

How about you? What happened in 2009 that might have sucked at first, but looking back you are now able to laugh about it?

Every day of our lives we have challenges, obstacles or inconveniences. You know them, we all have them: your kids are fighting, you argue with your spouse, your boss or clients give you work you dislike, etc. The list is endless…

Sometimes it is easy to feel that these circumstances are distractions that take us away from our true purpose and calling in life.  As much as we would like to believe that idea, nothing could be further from the truth. Everything that happens to us is a part of our purpose, and each circumstance gives us a chance to show our true nature.

Next time you find yourself in a stressful or challenging situation, take a moment to ask yourself these 7 questions:

1. How can I bring more vulnerability to this situation?
2. How can I bring more humility to this situation?
3. How can I be of more service in this situation?
4. How can I bring more generosity to this situation?
5. How can I bring more compassion to this situation?
6. How can I bring more willingness to this situation?
7. How can I bring more honesty to this situation?

These powerful questions help us to shift from our imperfect state and give more energy to our higher selves.

Recognizing that each of us have a divine nature that yearns to shine, it is also important to acknowledge that we also have a more human, less-than-perfect side that shines more often than we care to admit. In each moment, though, we have the ability to take steps to give more voice to our divinity than our imperfections. Asking these questions will shift your awareness to the greatness inside you that always seeking a voice.

Today is your day to shine…

What do you think of when you hear someone described as “needy?”

The basic physical needs – such as food, water & shelter – are obvious ones that we all recognize as common to all people.  How often, though, do we fail to recognize the psychological needs that we all share?

Is it possible that the label of “neediness” that some people use have caused us to ignore the reality that even healthy, well-adjusted people have basic needs?

Perhaps a proper understanding will allow us to have a healthier relationship with our own needs. And, possibly, eliminate some of “neediness” as well.

1. Certainty/Comfort – We all want to be comfortable, and a great deal of comfort comes in having certainty. We want to know that our car will start and that the fridge will have food for us to eat. Having a certainty of these things eliminates stress.  Human interactions, however, provide far less certainty.

   An unhealthy relationship with this need will lead us to try to control our circumstances, or other people. The degree to which we lack internal certainty (faith, courage, confidence) will be related to how much we feel the need to control the external circumstances.

2. Variety – The spice of life! We all need a little bit of adventure in our lives. Some find this through watching a movie that they haven’t seen yet, others find it through bunjee jumping.

   This need is in contrast to certainty, which reminds us that there is a balance that needs to be found. With too much certainty we get bored, but with too much variety fear or confusion can enter in.

3. Significance – We all yearn to know that we are here for a purpose, that our lives are important.  This is a way that we can be unique… a sense of identity that makes us distinct from others.

   In a healthy sense, this need will lead us to self-discovery and an understanding our gifts & talents. Unhealthily, we can find ourselves trying to fill this need through egotism, drama addiction or materialism.

4. Connection/Love – While our need for significance leads us to be separate from others, our need for connection with others – or love – is what draws us together.  We want to know that we belong, that we are cared for and  that we are understood.

   One of the most satisfying ways that we can fill this need is within family or intimate relationships. Others may seek to fill this need through clubs, social networking, religious groups or gangs.

5. Growth – All things in nature are either growing or dying. Since there is no finish line, or standard that we reach to lets us know that we’ve “made it” and are now complete, we have a desire for growth and improvement. This can be through physical, spiritual, intellectual growth, etc.
6. Contribution – The assurance that we have been a part of something bigger than ourselves is critical to our fulfillment, though it may be more apparent in some than others. Deep down, though, we all want to know that we leave a legacy, or make the world a better place by being here.

In what ways can understanding these needs provide you with more insight into the choices you make?

How can understanding these needs help you have more compassion in dealing with others?

Jim Rohn

The recent passing of Self-Improvement legend Jim Rohn has caused many to reflect and pay tribute to his life, and his teachings.  It is likely that you have recently seen his ideas in blog posts, Facebook notes or status updates and tweets on Twitter. We can’t imagine the impact of this trend since “ideas can be life-changing. Sometimes all you need to open the door is just one more good idea.”

Some of my favorite ideas from Jim Rohn are on the subject of character. Here are a few that I have pondered:

• Affirmation without discipline is the beginning of delusion.
• Character isn’t something you were born with and can’t change, like your fingerprints. It’s something you weren’t born with and must take responsibility for forming.
• Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.
• The major value in life is not what you get. The major value in life is what you become.
• We must all suffer one of two things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.

Each of these insights has power to change the way we think, and the actions we take on a daily basis. And while it is  honorable ways to pay our respects by sharing these ideas, I am certain that if Mr. Rohn had one more lesson to teach us, it would be for us to take action.  To quote John Ruskin:

“Education does not mean teaching people to know what they do not know; it means teaching them to behave as they do not behave.”

May we all let his words sink down from our minds to deep into our hearts.

In what way can you take these ideas and put them into action?

While sculpting the great statue of David, Michelangelo was asked why he was working so hard. His response was a simple, but profound statement that each of us should consider as it relates to us:

David - Il Gigante

There is an angel inside of this rock and I am setting him free.

Likewise, there is something divine inside of you… in fact, it isn’t just “in” you. It IS you.  It is your very essence. You are a diving being with so much love, light, power & grace that if you were to only recognize it, you would, as Thomas Edison said: “literally astonish yourself.”

The process of ‘becoming’ aligned with our true nature, then, isn’t about adding something that isn’t there, but rather a process of letting go of the things which cloud our ability to see our sacred & divine essence.  This process is akin to the process that Michelangelo used to release the “angel” that became the greatest sculpture in all of history.

Here are the 4 steps in sculpting, that will also release the angel inside of us:

1. Chipping - This is the highest impact part of it all.  It’s when the biggest pieces are smashed away with brute force. These parts are those that must simply go if we are even to begin to see the angel at all…. and it can be a painful experience.

   In each of us, there are some things that just have to go. Plain and simple, some of our vices, weaknesses, emotional attachments and addictions have to go if we are ever to realize our true potential. Without these jarring experiences, we will never see (or show others) the true nature that lies inside of us.  It may be painful, but eliminate these blocks that keep your true nature hidden from yourself and the world.

2. Sculpting - Sculpting continues the same process of removing what doesn’t belong, but it uses a different chisel, and is much more deliberate. Instead of powerful smashing that removes large chunks, sculpting takes a more refined approach and take much longer to remove the fine pieces that stand in the way. It is a delicate process of revealing the beauty of what the sculpture is intended to be.

   This more deliberate process in our own lives is about continued discipline in molding ourselves and persevering in the actions we know that will strengthen us. Are you reading from books that will inspire your mind and develop your spirit? Are you spending time with friends who lift, inspire & understand you? Are you treating yourself like you are your own most precious resource? This process takes confidence and self love.. and both of those come when we start to see clearly the angel deep inside.

3. Sanding - When the sculptor has created the outline of what the sculpture will be, sanding is the process of wearing away the jagged edges that can cut us.

   Sanding is a conscious choice in our lives. We have numerous experiences that would grate on us, get on our nerves, make us upset, etc. Sanding is the choice that we make to illuminate these seemingly negative circumstances and turn them into a positive. It’s about shifting our focus from the gritty sandpaper on the outside, and seeing the act of refinement that is happening on us. We stop seeing the other person, or outside circumstance as a problem, but see our our flaws and begin to let them go. The “adversity” becomes a gift, and we recognize that has nothing to do with anyone other than ourselves.

4. Polishing - The part that makes the sculpture shine!

   This is the part of the process that we all want to skip to. We want to look good, and shine before the world. This is justified since you are an amazing divine being worthy of celebration, but unless the proper foundation is laid it will not stand.In our lives, we all have moments of shining, and we deserve them. To have a lasting shine, the kind that comes from within, though, we have to pay our dues.  If we want to shine continually, we can’t fake it… it has to come from a foundation character. We can’t project it beyond what our character will sustain, so we need to pay our dues to become aligned with our true nature and in harmony with true principles.

There is an angel inside of you. It IS you… it is who you were born, and it is who the world needs right now.  By taking the time to reflect on who that angel is, and allowing yourself to go through the process of letting go of your imperfections and baggage, you will begin to bring to the world the gift most precious above all else: YOU.